I: Prayer as Encounter
II: Prayer as Dialogue
III: When Should We Pray?
IV: Short Prayers
V: Prayer and Life
VI: Orthodox Prayer Books
VII: Prayer Rules
VIII: The Danger of Habituation
IX: The Disposition of the Body at Prayer
X: Prayer Before Icons
XI: Prayer For Our Neighbors
XII: Prayer For the Departed
XIII: Prayer For Our Enemies
XIV: Family Prayer
XV: Church Prayer
XVI: Why Do We Need to Go to Church?
XVII: On Compunction and Tears
XVIII: The Battle with Extraneous Thoughts
XIX: The Jesus Prayer
XX: What’s So Good About The Jesus Prayer?
XXI: The Practice of the Jesus Prayer
XXII: Books on the Jesus Prayer
XXIII: “Our Father, Who Art in the Heavens”
XXIV: “Hallowed Be Thy Name”
XXV: “Thy Kingdom Come”
XXVI: “Thy Will Be Done, on Earth as it is in Heaven”
XXVII: “Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread”
XXVIII: “And Forgive Us Our Debts As We Forgive Our Debtors”
XXIX: “And Lead Us Not Into Temptation, But Deliver Us From the Evil One”
XXX: Prayer to the Mother of God
XXXI: Prayer to the Saints
XXXII: Life is Impossible Without Prayer
I: Prayer as Encounter
Prayer is an encounter with the Living God. Christianity gives man direct access to God, Who listens to man, helps him, and loves him. This is the fundamental difference between Christianity and, for example, Buddhism, in which during meditation the one praying deals with a certain impersonal super-being, in which he is immersed and in which he is dissolved, but he does not feel God as a living Person. In Christian prayer, man feels the presence of the Living God.
God become Man is revealed to us in Christianity. When we stand before an icon of Jesus Christ, we contemplate the Incarnate God. We know that it is impossible to represent, depict, or portray God on an icon or picture. But it is possible to depict God become Man, such as He revealed Himself to people. Through Jesus Christ as Man we uncover God for ourselves. This uncovering takes place in prayer, in conversion to Christ.
Through prayer we know that God participates in everything that takes place in our lives. Therefore, conversation with God should not take place in the background of our lives, but should be its main content. There are many barriers between man and God that can be overcome only with the help of prayer.
It is often asked: why do we need to pray, to ask God for something, if God already knows what we need? This is how I would reply. We do not pray in order to beg for something from God. Yes, in some cases we do ask Him for specific help in various everyday circumstances. But this should not be the main content of prayer.
God cannot only be an “intermediate agent” in our earthly affairs. The main content of prayer should always be standing before God, encounter with Him. We need to pray in order to be with God, to come into contact with God, to feel God’s presence.
However, an encounter with God does not always take place in prayer. After all, even when meeting with a person we are not always able to overcome the barriers that divide us and to descend into the depths; often our communication with people is confined to the surface level. Such it is in prayer, too. Sometimes we feel that between God and us is a kind of blank wall, that God does not hear us. But we should understand that God did not place this barrier there: we ourselves have erected it through our sins. In the words of one Western medieval theologian, God is always next to us, but we are often far from Him; God always hears us, but we do not hear Him; God is always within us, but we are on the outside; God is at home in us, but we are strangers to Him.
Let us remember this when we are preparing for prayer. Let us remember that every time we stand in prayer we are coming into contact with the Living God.
II: Prayer as Dialogue
Prayer is a dialogue. It includes not only our own turning towards God, but also the response of God Himself. As in every dialogue, in prayer it is important not only to speak out and express oneself, but also to listen to the response. God’s response does not always come directly in the minutes of prayer; sometimes it happens somewhat later. It can happen, for example, that we ask God for immediate help, but it only comes after several hours or days. But we understand that it took place because we asked God for help in prayer.
Through prayer we can learn a great deal about God. When praying, it is very important to be prepared for what God reveals to us; but He can prove to be other than we had imagined Him. Often we make the mistake of approaching God with our own ideas about Him, and these ideas can obscure from us the real image of the Living God, which God Himself can reveal to us. Often people create in their own minds a kind of idol and then pray to this idol. This dead, artificially created idol becomes an obstacle or barrier between the Living God and us people. “Make yourself a false image of God and try praying to him. Make yourself an image of an unmerciful and cruel Judge, and try praying to Him with confidence and love,” remarked Metropolitan Anthony of Sourozh. Thus, we should be ready for God to reveal Himself as different than we had imagined Him. Therefore, approaching prayer, one needs to abandon all images that our human imagination and fantasy produce.
God’s response can take place in different ways, but prayer is never unrequited. If we do not hear a response, it means that something is not right in us ourselves; it means that we have not yet sufficiently tuned ourselves to the right way for encountering God.
There is an instrument called a tuning fork, used for tuning pianos; this device gives the clear sound of an “A.” The strings of the piano must be strung in such a way that the sound they produce is in strict accordance with the sound of the tuning fork. As long as the “A” string is not sufficiently taut, no matter how many times you hit the keys, the tuning fork will remain silent. But the moment the string reaches the necessary degree of tension, the tuning fork – a lifeless piece of metal – will suddenly begin to sound. Having adjusted the one “A” string, the master can then configure this “A” in the other octaves (in a piano each key strikes several strings, creating a special surround sound). Then he can set the “B,” “C,” and so forth, one octave after another, until finally the entire instrument will be configured in accordance with the tuning fork.
So it must be with us in prayer. We should tune into God, adjusting our entire life – all the strings of our soul – to Him. When we adjust our life to God; when we learn to fulfill His commandments; when the Gospel becomes our moral and spiritual law; and when we learn to live in accordance with God’s commandments, then we begin to feel how the soul responds to the presence of God in prayer, just as a tuning fork responds to an perfectly stretched string.
III: When Should We Pray?
When and how long should one pray? The Apostle Paul writes: Pray without ceasing (1 Thessalonians 5:17). St. Gregory the Theologian writes: “One needs to remember God more often than one breathes.” Ideally, the Christian’s entire life should be imbued with prayer.
Many troubles, sorrows, and tribulations come about because people forget about God. There are criminals who are believers, but at the moment of committing their crimes they did not think about God. It is hard to imagine someone who would commit a murder or theft while thinking about the all-seeing God, from Whom no evil is hidden. And man commits all sin precisely at such times that he does not remember God.
The majority of people are not able to pray during the course of the day, for which reason one needs to find a time, even if a short one, when one can remember God.
In the morning you wake up with thoughts about what needs to get done that day. Before you begin work and getting immersed in the inevitable bustle, dedicate at least a few minutes to God. Stand before God and say: “Lord, Thou hast given me this day; help me to spend it without sin, without blemish; keep me from all evil and misfortune.” And invoke God’s blessing on the day that is beginning.
Throughout the course of the entire day, strive to remember God more frequently. If you do not feel well, turn to Him with prayer: “Lord, I am not well; help me.” If you feel well, say to God: “Lord, glory to Thee; I thank Thee for this joy.” If you are worried about someone, tell God: “Lord, I am worried for him; I am concerned about him; help him.” And so forth throughout the course of the day: whatever happens to you, put it into prayer.
When the day has come to an end and you are ready for bed, remember the past day, thank God for all good things that have taken place, and offer repentance for all those unworthy deeds and sins that you have committed during the day. Ask for God’s help and blessing for the coming night. If you learn to pray like this over the course of every day, you will soon notice how much sounder your life will become.
People often justify their reluctance to pray by the fact that they are too busy and are overloaded with things to do. Yes, many of live in sort of rhythm unlike that of people of antiquity. Sometimes we have to do a great number of things over the course of the day. But in life there are always certain pauses. For example, we might stand at the bus stop for three to five minutes; if we take the train, for twenty or thirty minutes. We dial a number and get a busy signal – another few minutes. Let us at least use these pauses for prayer; let it at least not be wasted time.
IV: Short Prayers
People often ask: how should we pray, in what words, and in what language? Some even say: “I do not pray because I do not know how; I do not know any prayers.” One does not need any specialized skill for prayer. One can simply talk with God. At the divine services of the [Russian] Orthodox Church, we use a special language: Church Slavonic. But in private prayer, when we are alone with God, there is no need for any special languages. We can pray to God in the language we use when speaking with people, when thinking.
Prayer should be very simple. St. Isaac the Syrian said: “The whole fabric of your prayer should be succinct. One word saved the publican, and one word made the thief on the cross heir to the Heavenly Kingdom.”
Let us recall the parable of the Publican and the Pharisee: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner (Luke 18:10-13). And this short prayer saved him. Let us also remember the thief who was crucified with Jesus and who said to Him: Lord, remember me when Thou comest into Thy kingdom (Luke 23:42). This alone was enough for him to enter Paradise.
Prayer can be extremely brief. If you are just starting out on your path of prayer, begin with very short prayers, such as can allow you to focus. God does not need words; He needs men’s hearts. Words are secondary; of paramount importance are the feeling and disposition with which we approach God. To approach God without a feeling of reverence or with distraction – when during prayer our mind wanders to the side – is much more dangerous than saying the wrong words in prayer. Distracted prayer has neither meaning nor value. A simple law is at work: if the words of prayer do not reach our heart, they will not reach God. As it is sometimes put, such prayer does not reach above the ceiling of the room in which we are praying, and it should reach the heavens. Therefore it is very important that each word of prayer should be felt deeply by us. If we are incapable of focusing on the long prayers contained in the prayer books of the Orthodox Church, try your hand at shorter prayers: “Lord, have mercy,” “Lord, save,” Lord, help me,” “God, have mercy on me, the sinner.”
One ascetic struggler said that if we could, with the full force of our feelings – with all our heart and soul – just say the prayer “Lord, have mercy,” then that would be enough for salvation. But the problem is that, as a rule, we cannot say this with all our heart; we cannot say this with all our whole life. Therefore, in order to be heard by God, we tend to use many words.
Let us remember that God long for our hearts, not for our words. If we will turn to Him with our whole hearts, then we will certainly get a response.
V: Prayer and Life
Prayer involves not only joy and attainments, which take place because of it, but also painstaking daily labor. Sometimes prayer brings enormous joy, refreshing man and giving him new strength and opportunities. But it very often happens that one is not disposed towards prayer, that one does not want to pray. Thus, prayer should not depend upon our mood. Prayer is labor. St. Silouan the Athonite said: “To pray is to shed blood.” As in every labor, this requires great effort, sometimes enormous effort, in order to force oneself to pray even when one does not want to. And such an effort [podvig] will be repaid one hundredfold.
But why do we sometimes not want to pray? I think that the main reason here consists of the fact that our life does not correspond to prayer, is not configured for it. In childhood, when I was in music school, I had an excellent violin teacher: his lessons were very interesting, but sometimes very difficult – but it depended not on his mood, but rather on how well or poorly I had prepared for the lesson. If I had practiced a great deal, learned a given piece and come to class fully prepared, then the lesson went by at one go, and both the teacher and I were pleased. But if I put it off all week and came unprepared, then the teacher would get upset and it was sickening to me that the lesson did not go as I had hoped.
It is exactly the same with prayer. If our life is not a preparation for prayer, then it can be very difficult for us to pray. Prayer is the gauge of our spiritual life, a kind of litmus test. We need to construct our life in such a way that it conforms to prayer. When reciting the prayer “Our Father,” we say: “Lord, Thy will be done,” which means that we should always be ready to fulfill God’s will, even if this will contradicts our human will. When we say to God: “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors,” we thereby commit ourselves to pardoning people and forgiving their debts, because if we do not forgive our debtors then, by the logic of this prayer, God will not forgive us our debts.
Thus, the one must correspond to the other: life to prayer, and prayer to life. Without this correspondence we will not succeed either in life or in prayer.
Let us not hesitate if we find it difficult to pray. This means that God is presenting us with new challenges, which we should resolve both in prayer and in life. If we learn to live in accordance with the Gospel, then we will learn to pray in accordance with the Gospel. Then our life will become complete, spiritual, and truly Christian.
VI: Orthodox Prayer Books
One can pray in different ways, in one’s own words for example. Such prayer should constantly accompany one. Morning and evening, day and night, one can turn to God with simple words coming from the depths of one’s heart.
But there are also prayers that were compiled by the saints in antiquity, which need to be read in order to learn how to pray. These prayers are contained in the “Orthodox Prayer Book.” There you will find prayers for the morning and evening, for repentance and thanksgiving, along with various canons, akathists, and much else. When you purchase an “Orthodox Prayer Book,” do not be alarmed that there are so many prayers. You do not have to read all of them.
If the morning prayers are read quickly, this takes about twenty minutes. But if one reads them thoughtfully and carefully, responding in one’s heart to each word, then reading them can take a whole hour. Therefore, if you do not have time, do not try to read all the morning prayers; it is better to read one or two, but in such a way that every word reaches your heart.
Before the section with the “Morning Prayers,” it says: “Having risen from sleep, before any other action, stand reverently, considering thyself to be in the presence of the All-seeing God, and, having made the sign of the Cross, say: ‘In the Name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen.’ Then pause a moment, until all thy senses are calmed and thy thoughts forsake all things earthly.” This pause, this “moment of silence,” before beginning to pray is very important. Prayer should grow out of the quietness of our hearts. People who daily “read through” the morning and evening prayers constantly have the temptations of reading the “rule” as quickly as possible in order to get on with the business of the day. Often, with such reading, the most important thing – the content of the prayers – is eluded.
In the Prayer Book there are many petitions addressed to God that are repeated many times. For example, you can come across the recommendation to repeat “Lord, have mercy” twelve or forty times. Some people see this as some kind of formality and read this prayer as quickly as possible. By the way, in Greek “Lord, have mercy” is “Kyrie, eleison.” In Russian there is the verb kurolesit’ [to play tricks], which came from the fact that readers on the choir often quickly or repeatedly read “Kyrie, eleison” – that is, they were not praying, but were playing. Thus, in prayer one does not need to play tricks [kurolesit’]. No matter how many times this prayer is read, it should be spoken with care, reverence, and love, with full delivery.
One does not need to try to read through all the prayers. It is better to dedicate twenty minutes to the single prayer “Our Father,” repeating it several times, pondering every word. It is not easy for someone who is not accustomed to prayer immediately to read through a large number of prayers – and this is not something to which one should aspire. It is important to become imbued with the spirit that is breathed by the prayers of the Church Fathers. This is the main benefit to be derived from the prayers contained in the “Orthodox Prayer Book.”
VII: Prayer Rules
What is a prayer rule? These are prayers that one reads regularly, daily. Everyone has a different prayer rule. For one person, the morning or evening prayers take up several hours, while for another they take a few minutes. Everything depends on one’s spiritual disposition, on the degree of one’s rootedness in prayer, and on how much time one has.
It is very important that one keep a prayer rule, even a very short one, so that one would be regular and constant in prayer. But the rule should not turn into a formality. The experience of many believers shows that, by constantly reading through the same prayers, their